May. 16th, 2008

ponygirl72: Tucker Aside (Default)
That's a version of the question I asked years ago when I first heard about geese grazing. 'Cause, y'know, they're *birds*, for crying out loud. With *beaks*. Beaks, for eating bugs, and berries, and... stuff.

A: Yep, they do. Seriously. How? Like this:

That melodic cheeping you hear is the sound of happy chickens. Another thing they do when they're happy and content? They crash out and sleep flat on their sides, with both legs stretched out, occasionally waking enough to stretch the top leg and wing, cat-like, toes wriggling in the sun. That one threw me for a loop the first time I saw it.

Me: "Ack! It's dead!!!!"

Chicken: ::yawn:: ::stretch::

Me: "Oh. Okay." ::feels stupid::

In factory farming, the last third of the chicken's beak is snipped off with wire cutters so it can't peck its cage mates to death in a cannibalistic rage. I'm guessing they don't sleep much in the factory farms.

In other news, the rabbits are freaking delicious, either wrapped in bacon and roasted, or stewed with rice and carrots in beer with a little vinegar. I was very impressed with my Mom's killing technique: she's *fast*. Those rabbits went from happy (and very drunk on the wine they'd been given overnight) to dead with less than 2 seconds of "Whu--?" in between. Closer to 1 second, in many cases.

The fish are being, um, fishy. At least I assume they are, since I can't actually see them.

Lastly, I am currently in the midst of the Great Lamb Dilemma. I can get 4 bottle lambs very cheaply (because no one wants to mess with bottle lambs), but, well, I don't really want to mess with bottle lambs. Or I can *probably* get weaned lambs from this lady who *sort of* wants to cut back her flock of 400 to something more manageable. *Maybe*. My head says I'd probably better snatch up the bottle lambs while I can. My heart asks if I really want to shoot something that crawled into my lap and suckled milk from a bottle in my hand six months previously, and then skin it, gut it, and cut it into pieces.

And hence, the omnivore's dilemma. From the sheep's point of view, scenario one is obviously the best:

"Oh, Momma who used to feed me the milk has come to visit me! What's that metal thing she's got in her hand? Maybe it's got milk in it?" BANG! ::dead::

Scenario two is a little worse:

"La, de, da, la, la. Boy this grass sure is delicious. Oh, noes! The two-legged things that fill my water and move me to a new grazing pen every day are catching me and holding me! This is scary!" BANG! ::dead::

And scenario three, which is the norm, is really quite awful:

"Why did they put me on this scary stock trailer and take me away from my farm? This place smells like dead animals... I don't *wanna* go in there! I'm scared! I'M SCARED!! WHO IS THAT BIG MAN COMING TOWARD ME? I'M TRAPPED, I CAN'T MOVE!" ::captive bolt:: ::dead::

Of course, the order of preference of the HUMANS is 180 degrees opposite, and we are the ones with all of the power in the relationship.

Discuss. (And I know there's at least one vegetarian out there... I'd love to hear from you.)


ponygirl72: Tucker Aside (Default)

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